Today’s post is dedicated to my grandpa. One year ago today my family lost our patriarch. My grandfather was a man who stood strong in what he believed in but loved each of us with all of his being. My life changed March 4, 2013, as I am sure those who knew him felt the same way. I hope you are enjoying heaven Grandpa!
From as far back as I can remember, I have loved stories and the written word. I can remember reading books as a child and could actually feel myself “getting lost in a book”. Words and descriptions are so powerful to me. My whole life I have been exposed to stories of the past. My grandparents have told some many stories of their childhood and younger years. Sometimes these stories were told so often that many times they went on deaf ears. However, I can probably say many of them verbatim. Now that my grandfather is gone, I long for those days of stories and the constant repetition of his memories. It’s one of the only things I have to hold on to of him and I crave for any stories I can get. My grandmother is now the holder of those stories. When I hear a memory coming to light in her conversation, I listen intently. She is the last link to my grandfather and to her generation.
You might be asking, “Where is she going with this?”. Don’t worry, I always get to my main point. Don’t forget, I have the gift of storytelling. It is in my genes. Of course, I digress again. Let’s get back on topic. When I found out I was pregnant, I wanted to do something to capture that time in my life so that my child could experience it with me when they got older. My foray into journaling began. I wrote an entry once every 2 weeks telling my little one what I was feeling, any fears/excitements I had, any exciting adventures Daddy and I had gone on, etc. I have continued this journal for my son and plan on doing so in the future. I do not write in it as often. However, I do capture all milestones he makes and the fun adventures we go on as a family.
I wanted to do this so that when he gets to be a parent, and even a grandparent ( Mrs. Z, don’t rush your life away!!), he can pass on these memories to his children and grandchildren. Many of the stories my grandfather told I’ve either simply forgotten or I remember bits and pieces. He is not here to fill in the blanks. It hurts my heart sometimes to think about that. Life is funny, though. There are times where I am doing something and, out of nowhere, I remember a bit of a story I had forgotten. Or I say something, and it’s something my grandfather would have said. I look at my son and tell him that his great grandfather use to say that. I know he doesn’t understand what I am saying, but he smiles. And I know one day when I tell him those stories about his great grandfather, he’s going to love them. I just wish grandpa was here to tell them.
I will take my leave now, but I want to leave you with some words of wisdom. I know I am not at an age of great wisdom yet, but I feel that I have gathered a little bit of wisdom in my years on Earth so far. So, here you go: Listen to the stories. Hold on to them. Record them. Share them. You are the link to the past. Our time here is so short. Make the best of it. And remember to live life to the fullest!
I still miss you a lot grandpa! I love you old man! <3 DJC SR.